


The Set-Up

by GayGothicFanboy



Category: Archer (Cartoon)
Genre: Attempted assassination, Barry is just plain evil, F/F, Fires, Kissing, Missions, Saving lives, teaming up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-05
Updated: 2020-05-05
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:14:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24027985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GayGothicFanboy/pseuds/GayGothicFanboy
Summary: Malory sends Ray and Lana to protect the Parisian diamond but things go down hill--FAST.
Relationships: Lana Kane/Katya Kazanova
Kudos: 3





	The Set-Up

"You two will be attending a party in Paris," Malory said.

Ray and Lana exchanged glances of 'what the hell?'.

Malory blinked a couple times; she was missing the chance of seeing her son, Sterling, thwart the masterminds behind the mission. (After all, Sterling was healing from his coma). She sighed and took a sip of whiskey. "At this party, the KGB is suspected of trying to steal a precious diamond."

Ray looked confused. "What would the KGB want with a diamond?"

Malory shrugged. "I dunno--maybe to simulate the economy. Russia is a third world country after all."

Lana glanced at her. "Since when?"

Malory ignored that comment. "Off you go."

-

Ray was extremely excited to see all the sights Paris had to offer.

"I've already seen all of those," Lana said.

Ray looked at her. "Since when?"

Lana told him, "Since I had to save Archer's sorry little ass a few years back."

Ray gazed at her. His eyes narrowed. "Just because you've seen it, doesn't mean I can't go and see it."

Lana sighed. "I know you want to see them, hon. But, we've got to protect the Parisian diamond."

Ray had muttered a few things in protest but then he agreed to go.

-

The room was highly crowded.

Ray had ran off to flirt with one of the male waiters--typical Ray….

Lana's eyes scanned the huge room for any sign of the KGB. 

Nothing.

She spoke into her telecommunications device. "I don't see any Russian agents? You?"

Ray responded back a few moments later. "I've got nothing in my sights except for the waiter's hot ass!"

Lana sighed and rolled her eyes. "Well, Ray, just keep your eyes open."

"You've got it."

Lana shut the device off.

"Long time no see," a voice called from behind her.

Lana turned.

Standing there was Barry.

"Barry, what are you doing here?" Lana questioned.

Barry shrugged. "They wanted me back at O.D.I.N.. Then I was sent here to keep the Parisian diamond safe."

"Me too," Lana commented.

Barry laughed. "That's interesting! Can I buy you a drink?"

Lana nodded and smiled. "Sure."

-

For the next hours Lana and Barry caught up with each other.

Barry laughed. "Lana you're going to kill me but-"

"But what?" Lana asked.

Barry pulled a gun on her. "There's been a change of plans."

"Barry-"

Barry called to some guards. "Take her to the cell. And then find Bisset. And I want Bisset alive."

"Barry, I thought you were protecting the Parisian diamond," Lana choked out as the guards grabbed her arms.

Barry chuckled. He scratched the back of his head. "Well…, there's no diamond."

"Then why are you here?" Lana asked.

Barry told her, "I'm killing a French ambassador by the name of Bisset. Also, I plan to blow this place up." And you're not going to stop me."

The guards then proceeded to take Lana down a long corridor and then they thew her into a enclosed room. They slammed the door shut. 

The door was some sort of metal.

Lana angrily shot at the door with her TEC-9's. "Son of a bitch!" She growled as she ran out of ammo.

The bullets did nothing for her.

She raised her other TEC-9.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," an accented voice called out.

Lana quickly turned. She saw the face of a familiar blond woman.

It was no other than Katya Kazanova.

"What are you doing here if there's no diamond?" Lana asked, her voice hostile.

"The KGB had to make sure that Bisset wasn't killed so they're wouldn't be war," Katya began. "But...Barry paid a woman to play my older sister, Irina." Then Katya added, "She ran away from home years ago."

"Oh," Lana mouthed.

"Then I got lured in here. After that, the lady ripped off her blond wig. She yelled I'm not your fucking sister! Barry said he killed my sister," Katya told Lana.

"That sick bastard," Lana commented.

"Barry said something about blowing this place into smithereens in an hour, and that was probably fifty something minutes ago," Katya informed Lana.

Lana wipped out her telecommunications device. She wasn't going to let all those people die. "Ray!"

"Yeah?" The voice sounded from the other side.

"Barry is here!"

"Barry the cyborg?" Ray asked.

"Yes!" Lana yelled.

"Jeez! Take it easy. Scream less," Ray suggested.

"Ray, this is an emergency. Barry planted a bomb. And you need to get everyone out. Including Ambassador Bisset," Lana instructed.

"Bisset is here? I heard he's got a hot ass."

"Ray!" Lana cried out.

"Jeez. Fine. I'll save everyone." 

It went silent for a minute.

Then: "Everyone is out. Including, Bisset."

"Good," Lana breathed.

The line went dead.

Then, the ground began to rumble.

Katya and Lana both exchanged a glance. "The bomb," they both simultaneously said.

Lana glanced at Katya. "What are you going?"

"I detect that there's fire out there."

Lana stared at her. "So, we're just going to wait until the fire eats us alive?"

Katya shook her head. "The fire must have at least made the metal door weak. I'll charge at it--knocking it down and we escape." Katya took a breath. "But-"

Lana eyed the cyborg. "But what?" Lana asked for the second time that night. She really hoped she wasn't just about to get betrayed. But, she wouldn't put it past Katya to double cross her.

"We'll be running through fire," Katya began to tell her. "And as Sterling would say, we'd be on a highway into the danger zone."

Lana wanted to face palm right here and now.

Katya ran at the door. 

The door crumbled.

Lana and Katya exchanged glances before stepping out into the fire.

They dashed through twisting corridors.

There was so much smoke.

Lana began to feel faint. Then, she fell foward and slipped into unconsciousness.

-

"Is she okay?" 

Lana heard slight voices.

Lana's eyes fluttered open.

Around her was Ray, Cheryl, Pam, Cyril, and Krieger. Hell even Malory and Archer were there.

Lana sat up and rubbed her throbbing and aching head. "Where am I?"

"You're in a hospital," Cheryl said. Then happily adding, "One of my favorite places."

Krieger said, "One of mine too! I love to harvest organs there!"

Lana had a slight nervous thought that one of her kidneys maybe gone but she shook it off. "I'm still in Paris, right?"

Archer nodded. "Yeah. We heard about what happened and we came as fast as we could."

Pam added, "You were out for awhile."

Krieger muttered underneath his breath, "But not long enough to deem me aloud to harvest your organs."

Lana slightly shivered. "So, do any of you know what happened after I passed out?"

Ray nodded. "You got your ass saved and then brang here."

"Thank you, Ray."

Ray told Lana, "Oh, honey, I didn't save you."

Lana looked confused. "Then who did."

"Katya," Ray began. "She got you out of the building. Then she got the police to go after Barry and his goons. Then she told Bisset that he should probably go into witness protection. Then, she got you here."

"Were you here with me the whole time?" Lana asked Ray.

Ray shook his head. "Nope. I went to see the Eiffel Tower and some other things."

Lana gazed at the others.

Cyril said, "We weren't there with you the whole time because we were flying out here."

"Then was anyone?" Lana's voice slightly wavered.

Ray told her, "Katya was. Matter of fact, she's right there." Ray pointed.

Lana gazed over to see Katya standing in the corner.

Katya nervously waved and stepped toward Lana.

Ray gazed at them. Then, to the others "Okay, guys out into the hallway. I think they need time alone." Ray ushered them.

Pam had muttered something about wanting to see 'hot girl on girl action'.

But finally, it was just Lana and Katya.

Lana smiled. "Thank you for saving my life."

Katya smiled back. "You're welcome."

"I'm sorry about your sister," Lana told the Russian.

Katya shrugged. "These things happen." Katya then said, "I've got to get back to Moscow." She turned to head to the door. She began to walk but then she stopped. Katya turned around, headed back toward Lana and kissed her right on the lips. Katya then opened the window. She'd probably leave from there just as she always liked to. "Good bye, Lana Kane. I will see you again." Then, Katya leaped.

Ray entered the room. "Where'd Robo go?"

Pam said, "She probably left from the window."

Lana was in too much of a daze to talk. She smiled thinkng about the kiss again. And who knows? Maybe she would meet Katya again.


End file.
